Category Archives: God Sized Dreams

“I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me”

Stewart Smalley and SNL left us with that beautiful little nugget…“I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me.”

While this phrase became one of those funny things that we would say to each other as teenagers I wonder how often any of us believed it?

In fact for the majority of my life I believed the opposite. I would never be good enough, I am not smart enough….and people won’t ever like me.

Why is it that it can be so easy to see our weaknesses and so hard to discover and name our strengths? (< ==== Click to Tweet)

When you look in the mirror what reflection do you see? Do you see the “ugly duckling” or the “beautiful swan”?

Do your eyes focus on all of the things you don’t like about yourself? Or are you able to see all of the good?

I want my reflection to be one of God’s grace, His light.

Sometimes getting to that place can seem selfish….especially if we aren’t used to putting the focus on ourselves and naming the positive things about us….

But in Holley’s Devotional “Opening the Door to Your God Sized Dream” she writes this: “But actually choosing to understand and embrace who you are is one of the most unselfish things you can do because it maximizes your ability to serve others and bring glory to God.”

If I want to bring glory to God I have to understand and develop those very things that He made strong in me! (< ==== Click to Tweet)

I spent some time listening to a couple of the speakers from this weekend’s IF Gathering. What I heard was amazing, I am probably going to have to buy the DVD if they make one available! But Rebekah Lyons said this and it really hit home for me. “Finding our calling is being in the place where our talents and our burdens collide.”

So I ask myself, and you….what stirs your heart? And how has God already equipped you to be a part of whatever picture that is?

It can be a bit of an overwhelming thought…but I think we just need to take it one step at a time….

So I start with my strengths and one of mine is my heart for missions….for helping others and giving back what God has so freely given us.

I can take those things that God built into the person that I am and find ways to use them for His glory. How cool is that?!

It doesn’t become something selfish or pretentious when we list our strengths when we are seeking to follow our God-given dreams!

Is it hard for you to name your strengths? I’d love to hear what one of your strengths is so that I can encourage you in your journey!!

I am joining my God-sized Dream sisters today and linking up at the God-sized Dreams Website….want to join the fun?? Click here to read more!

Photo Credit: rkramer62

When Jealousy Gets in the Way of Your Dreams

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I grew up feeling like I was never good enough. It wasn’t something that anyone told me, I was raised in a loving, supportive family. I just knew I didn’t fit in.

I was a little bit nerdy (ok a LOT), I took my schoolwork seriously and wasn’t good at sports. I desperately wanted to be a cheerleader but I had these awful short hamstrings that prevented me from doing any sort of toe touching! Oh and I was painfully shy. A complete and total package!

In fact, just in case you don’t believe me….drink it in ladies, drink it in!

I spent a lot of years wishing I was something more. Wanting to have the voice of the “popular Kristin” so that I could be in the school musical. Wanting to have the athletic ability of “Holley” so I could play on the basketball team, or the beautiful, long hair of “Alanna”, instead of my rocking mullet. Can you blame me?? Did you see the picture above?!

It didn’t matter what I DID have, I wanted what someone else had because I believed it to be better…..

I am sharing the rest of this story over at the God-sized Dreams site today – I would love for you to join me there!

Letting Go of the Past

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I apologize if I have shared this here before, it is a big part of my “story” and really shaped parts of my teenage life and has had an impact on my adulthood as well.

It was the 6th grade and I was awkward to say the least.

I grew up in a neighborhood with several kids my age and we were all friends. Several of those girls had older siblings in high school…so they kind of had an “in” to the cool scene.

I never had an “in”….I was always the girl who was friends with the girl who was friends with the popular people. Did you follow that?! 🙂

The point was that I remained on the outside, alone on that proverbial island, for a lot of years. And I desperately wanted to be invited “in”.

There was this girl…we will call her MW (that may or may not be her actual initials – and she may or may not have tattled on me in 1st grade when I was blown over by a winter wind into a metal bike rack, hitting my eye, causing a MASSIVE black eye that caused me to cry in class…but that is whole story for another time…ahem.) MW was having this party. A boy-girl party and it was a BIG deal.

ALL of the popular kids were invited…including my friends that were friends with those popular people.

I was not on the list. And it hurt.

My neighborhood friends were so sweet – they wanted to try and help me impress MW enough so that she would invite me to her party.

They helped me pick out the best outfit I had, and the plan was that I would wear this outfit to the next Friday’s High School Football game. Because that is where all the popular 6th graders went on a Friday night.

Oh, and somehow I thought it would be a good idea to not wear a coat, you know to keep from covering the awesomeness that my outfit held.

It was October, in South Dakota, at night….and it was COLD.

I froze that night, I shivered and shook and smiled my best crooked smile. And I hoped with all hope that I would finally get my invite.

My “best” wasn’t good enough. MW didn’t invite me to that party and I was crushed. I knew that I wouldn’t ever fit in and the next Friday night when everyone who was anyone was at the big party – I was at home – alone on my island once again.

Times like this can shape us can’t they?

As much as I’d like to say that it didn’t bother me or I got over it right away, here I am 30 years later and THAT is one of my most vivid memories from that time period.

Isn’t that sad?

It is one of the reasons that I have such a heart for kids at this age/phase. I KNOW how it feels to not be “good enough” by the world’s standards. And while I had a belief in God during that time, I didn’t have a personal relationship with Him that covered those hurts in my heart.

God was always there – but I hadn’t let Him be enough in my life. (< ==== Click to Tweet)

For years I struggled with the idea that I didn’t measure up.

It led me to believe as an adult that I wasn’t good-enough for God-sized dreaming because that kind of stuff is for the strong and talented.

In her devotional Holley says “God-sized dreaming isn’t for wimps. But at the same time it’s really only for wimps. Because we are all exactly that. We’re weak and broken and afraid. And we’re also strong and whole and filled with the resurrection power of Christ.”

Today I am a different woman.

While I still struggle with my image at times….I wish I were more fit, or had better hair, or knew how to parent with patience….God is showing me that I am “enough” because of Him! (<==== Click to Tweet)

There comes a point that we need to let go of the hurts of the past and move forward. We need to stop believing the lies that we won’t measure up and start holding on to the Truth that through Christ we will ALL measure up.

On my own I can’t do this “life”…but with Christ guiding me, I am confident and strong in His plan for me.

What in your past is holding you back from chasing your God-sized Dream?

Today is an extra special day because Holley’s newest book is available for purchase. “You’re Going to Be Okay” is a wonderful book and I will be posting even more about it in a few days…and there may just be a fun giveaway involved too!! Come back on Thursday for all the details! 😉

Linking up with my God-sized Dream sisters today continuing this discussion- will you join us here?

Photo Credit: gnuckx

The “What’s in it for me” Syndrome

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WIIFM

A funny little acronym that seems to define society these days, don’t you think?

“What’s in it for me?”

I’d love to stand here and tell you that I haven’t ever suffered from the WIIFM Syndrome, but I have. Whether it is on a corporate level at work, or with friendship building, and even writing and dream chasing….this syndrome has tripped me up on a number of occasions.

That and the comparision game are killers aren’t they? If I am not seeking out what’s in it for me then I am comparing my situation to someone else’s and finding myself unsatisfied.

But this isn’t how God wants us to live.

Selfish and self-seeking, jealous and resentful.

In Holley’s devotional “Opening the Door to Your God-sized Dreams” she talks about what our focus SHOULD be.

“If you chase the Giver, then you will always get what you want in the end – even if the God-sized dream you imagined doesn’t turn out to meet your expectations.”

Oh friends I have wasted YEARS chasing all the wrong things!

From the promotion that will give me status, or the perfect words to fill a blog post – often times I have done it all for me…..giving thanks to God when good things happen certainly, but ultimately to serve a selfish purpose in me not a glory one for Him.

Holley’s words hit me today, I had another post I thought I would write…..but instead these choppy ones are here instead.

God has been working on my heart. A.LOT.

I needed the work too – well I still do, I guess I may always be a work in progress.

Over the course of a couple of years many things that I thought were “important” were stripped away. Things I thought I had control over, plans for my life that I couldn’t see past.

All of them gone.

And for a time I felt hopeless and lost.

But God.

Oh those 2 powerful words!

God took what I thought were ashes and started rebuilding. Rebuilding in ways that were seemingly impossible. (<==== Click to Tweet)

I started to see His hand in every moment. Every referral, every client, every relationship and opportunity.

ALL HIS DOING!

He has taken my small, shattered dreams and blown me away with the size of His plans for my life and my family! (<==== Click to Tweet)

As I have given more and more over to God He has blessed me.

I don’t do this perfectly, heck I hardly do it well most days…..but when I try and focus on His plan, for my life, my marriage, my career….it all seems to return to me in amazing ways.

So today I often sit back and shake my head at all of it. I don’t understand it, don’t often feel like I deserve it – but continue to praise God for letting me be a part of this plan He has.

Dream chasing can be tough….sometimes it means we have to give up some old habits so that we can grow and stretch.

What’s in it for me today?

The opportunity to give ALL the glory to God.

My life won’t ever be perfect, I don’t expect it to. But I am confident that God WILL be in every detail and I am grateful for that understanding.

Do you love the Giver more than the gift? As we seek to follow our God-sized dreams may we always be pointing our thanks and praise back to the One who made each step possible!

Linking up today with my God-sized Dreamer sisters over at God-sized Dreams. Join us won’t you?!

Photo Credit: SueKing2011

What a Clogged Toilet Has to Do With a God-sized Dream

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This was my view last Friday night.

Everything a woman might hope for at the start of her weekend right?

Our daughter, who just turned 3, has been potty trained since this summer. It was early and wonderful to be out of diapers but it hasn’t always been perfect.

I still can’t say for sure what was (or might still be) stuck in the pipes of our plumbing, but I do know that my husband and son were both gone for the evening and I came upon the toilet that wouldn’t flush.

It wasn’t pretty, but it needed to be dealt with. So I went to find the toilet snake in the garage.

And yes, if you must know, we purchased one years ago and have had cause to use it multiple times. Our children seem to be called to putting various items and too much toilet paper into the toilet, thus clogging it.

So as I was desperately trying to unclog the mess, I was reflecting on the idea that sometimes we too find ourselves in the “muck”.

You know what I am talking about right?

Those times when things aren’t as “pretty” as we would have hoped, or we are stuck and it seems like God won’t or can’t use us.

And we wonder if this is all that our life will amount to? The unclogging of toilets, the cleaning up of messes, the breaking up of fights…..how do we dream in the thick of all that?

Holley Gerth reminds us that we need to just start saying Yes anyways.

Say yes when we feel scared about the next step.

Say yes when we feel too small.

Say yes when we feel like we are stuck in the muck.

Open your heart, Trust God, and say yes when He calls us.

Does that mean that by saying yes you won’t still be stuck at times? No!

But hopefully we can start to find joy even in the small things, because we know that they are important too.

Some days I am not called to write or to speak, I am just called to unclog toilets. And I am grateful that I can serve my family in doing that too! (<==== Click to Tweet)

When we say yes, with a grateful heart, to the icky things…imagine how it amazing it will be when we get to say yes to the wonderful?!

So say yes….what are you waiting for?

And just so you don’t think I am not given LOTS of opportunities for the “icky”….this happened as I was trying to unclog the toilet (which took over an hour)….

And NO, it isn’t chocolate – much to my dismay! 🙂

Laugh with me friends and start saying Yes! What a ride it has been for me as I have started to do so!

I am linking up with my sisters over at God-sized Dreams as we discover more about Gods plan for our lives and with Crystal Stine for her Behind the Scenes weekly link up sharing the stories behind the pictures we take – will you join us too?!

Clothed In Love – January Impact Opportunity

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My January Impact Opportunity comes a little late I know but for a good reason!

This is me and my dear friend Delonna in Washington DC earlier this fall! We had so much fun talking our way through the Botanical Gardens! 😉

Delonna is a fellow dreamer and a part of the God Sized Dream team. She has been such a blessing to me this past year and it has been exciting to see her grow her dream and watch the many ways God has used this dream to bless the lives of orphans.

I remember the day Delonna posted that she was opening a checking account for her non-profit organization, Clothed in Love.

In her own words – here is the mission of Clothed in Love:

“Did you know it is estimated there are over 150 MILLION orphans and abandoned children in the world? That number makes me stop and think HOW CAN I HELP?

If you want to hear more will you join me over at Circles of Faith where I am sharing all about Clothed in Love and giving you a peek into Delonna’s shop! Oh and if you leave a comment over there you will have a chance to win a pair of earrings too!! Don’t miss this!

Are You “Good Enough” to Fulfill A God-Sized Dream?

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I yelled at my kids tonight. I got frustrated and irritated and I snapped at them. Over glow sticks.

As I sat down to prepare this post, I got angry at my kids and lost my temper. I was focused on what I felt was important at the time, and I honestly just wanted them to go to bed.

Instead they wanted glow sticks. So I got angry and I lost it.

I wanted to come before you today in my best outfit, with perfect hair and just the right words…and instead I am here a broken sinner. A woman in need of grace.

How can I possibly be an example here when I don’t have it all together?!

Have you ever felt that way?

Unqualified and ill-equipped?

Maybe, if you are anything like me, you feel like God can’t use you if you aren’t “perfect.”

I am sharing my story over at God-sized Dreams – would you join me over there for the rest of the story?!

Photo Credit: Lucky Lynda

A Love of Words

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I have been a storyteller all my life.

Maybe not always a good one, as evidenced in some old home movies that my parents shared with us kids over Christmas! But telling stories, sharing about my life is something I have always enjoyed doing.

I have memories from long ago of an old cassette recorder that my parents had and let us use. This memory had remained pushed back into the recesses of my mind until this week.

I started thinking about what dreams I had as a child for my life, and while I couldn’t remember what those might have been, I did remember this cassette recorder.

My brother, sister and I would make recordings of our everyday life. We would sing and tell stories and laugh at how silly we thought we were.

It was an innocent time and we believed that our words mattered.

Our words were burned into those cassette tapes for all eternity (or until we erased them), but you get the point. Those tapes defined me, they were a reflection of my humor and joy, my love of music and storytelling.

But somewhere along the way, in the trials of growing up an awkward and nerdy teenager, I stopped believing that my words mattered.

In fact, at some point, I started believing the lies that I wouldn’t ever be good enough. I would never measure up and be popular. I would never make the cheer leading squad or the school musical.

I didn’t have anything special to offer.

Have you believed those lies? Can you remember a time when you felt you had a voice but don’t know how long it has been since you felt that was true?

Last week I put words to my God-sized Dream.

It was terrifying to me but I received some wonderful encouragement. Women shared that they felt the same way, they had unspoken dreams but they were being brave and taking the first step by speaking them out loud.

Oh the knee-knocking that was happening last week! 🙂

But finally taking that step and putting words to my dream was invigorating.

I could feel my “voice” coming back. That love of words that was stuffed away deep inside of me was growing in my heart.

I DO have a voice, and it matters – if to no one else – it matters to God. (<==== Click to Tweet)

So I speak because of Him! I speak on behalf of Him and I praise Him because He created me with this love of words. It was there all along, I had just forgotten about it.

I loved this excerpt from Holley’s 40 day devotional “Opening the Door to Your God-sized Dream”

“In many ways, God-sized dreaming is more about an attitude than an action. It’s living with an ongoing yes to whatever God asks of you.

It means choosing faith over fear

It means moving forward instead of holding back

It means believing God can accomplish his purposes for your life – no matter how hard things are right now.”

God has given me a love of words and has called me to share them.

It causes me fear at times and I wake most days feeling unworthy of the task. But I am holding on to the truth that He can accomplish His purposes in my life, regardless of how I feel about it! (<==== Click to Tweet)

There is freedom with that simple truth and I am thanking Him for that today!

What were the childhood desires of your heart? Can you see that God was equipping you even then to pursue your God-sized Dreams today?

Linking up today with other dreamers over at God-sized Dreams – if you blog we would love to have you come and join us in the fun!

Photo Credit: Nuscreen

The Podium

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Photo Credit: Andy Nguyen

When I was in the 6th grade we had an assignment to read a book and then write a report from the perspective of one of the characters in the story. For the life of me I can’t remember what book it is I read, but I think it had something to do with a young girl and her brother that was kidnapped and the effect it had on their family.

I wrote from the perspective of the sister and how her family was changed because of her brother’s disappearance. For some reason my teacher asked me to record my speech. I had to dress up in character, memorize my report and then I went down to this local Owl TV station and was videoed sharing my report.

It was terrifying and exhilarating at the same time.

Around that same time my mom started bringing me to the Christian Women’s Club breakfasts. We would dress up all fancy, go to the country club and eat a fun meal and hear a woman share her testimony of faith. These meetings were very influential in building my faith but they also placed in me a desire to do the same.

I wanted to be that woman, the one with a story to tell. The one who shared why her faith in Jesus made things better. I dreamed of standing behind a podium, making a difference.

To Continue Reading join me over at God-sized Dreams where I share the rest of my story! And then link up your own post with us as we talk about naming our dreams.

Better Than I Imagined….

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Photo Credit: Felix Montino

It still amazes me that 2013 has come to an end. How quickly this year seems to have gone! And as I sit down to reflect on my God Sized Dreams for 2013 I just want to start by thanking God for the many blessings He gave me this year.

I started 2013 on a journey to discovering what a “God Sized Dream” might be and more specifically what I thought that dream was in my own life.

I thought I had it all figured out. After starting this blog space in late December 2012, I was certain that God wanted me to have a place of encouragement and hope for others here in 2013. If I am being honest I would tell you that I was secretly hoping that maybe my blog would go big, that I would write that “it” post and it would go viral….or that I would start writing a book proposal. All big dreams for sure.

While I still believe that this place of encouragement is a part of my God Sized Dream, I am convinced that God had different and even better things planned for me that I was unable to see in the beginning.

The biggest blessing that I received this past year is the gift of Community.

A community in which I was accepted and loved, a community where I was able to stop always thinking about me and what I wanted to do – and start focusing on developing a skill of encouraging others in their dreams.

THIS has been the biggest unexpected and beautiful gift in my life this past year.

Women who were just faces on a computer screen became IRL friends when several of us met in person for the first time at Allume. Community was embraced and celebrated. Tears were shed and laughter welled from the depths of me that I hadn’t felt in a long time. It was God-filled for sure!

And while 2013 has also been filled with personal failures big and small, I have learned that God is in all the details. He is with me through everything that I do well and everything I fail at. He loves me regardless and having a greater understanding of that gift was worth the journey.

The GSD team led me specifically to a group of women that all believed in something greater than themselves. A place where we could take what we have learned from this year and give back to other women seeking the same path.

Under Christine’s leading we have come together and as announced yesterday started this amazing God-sized Dreams website. Something like this was NOT on my radar at all. And that is what I love the most about it.

It is all God’s!

It wasn’t “My” idea or plan, it was His. So I can look back on 2013 and see in all the places where God deserves the glory. Just as He should have.

2013 was never about me. (I know this is not a surprise to most of you….but it is at times a surprise to me!) 🙂

While I learned some wonderful lessons and received so many gifts in this community…..ultimately none of it would have been possible without God’s leading and direction in the first place.

So while 2013 ends differently than I had anticipated it might, it ends more beautifully than I could have ever expected and each moment was worth it!

Did 2013 end as you had hoped?? I’d love to hear how God exceeded you expectations too! And if you blog why don’t you link up with us today over at God-sized Dreams and share your 2013 recap!