Fear isn’t a new “issue” in my life.
It seems to be a stronghold in my life that I need to take a deeper look at. And for me, often the fears that I have lead to sin in my life.
The kind of sin where I make choices based of out fear and not faith….choices that hurt those closest to me.
The enemy is keenly aware of my issues with fear and at any possible turn he seeks to wrap tighter the chains of bondage…
Have you ever been there friends? Knowing in your head the Truth, the plan God has for you….but going in a complete and opposite direction because of fear?
I found myself in that very place again this weekend. I shared here about the recent changes in our home with my husband’s work etc. No sooner did I post about the faith I had in God’s plan for all of this when the lies started coming….
“This won’t work”, “This was a mistake”, “Your marriage is going to suffer”….
I was bombarded once again with all of the “What-Ifs”.
And I responded in fear…told Dominic I thought it was all a mistake…basically quit before I got started.
Oh yes, I am good like that.
You see I don’t stop to “think”….to process my feelings to determine if they are rational or irrational..I just act out. It is a pattern of behavior that has become the “norm”…but it isn’t healthy and it hurts those that I love the most.
So I am sharing these things here so that I can try and remain accountable….even if in the smallest way. You see I write here about faith and hope and all the ways that God has blessed our lives, in spite of us.
And I believe it…I want you to believe it….find encouragement in it. But I need to be able to live out my faith in a real and tangible way in my everyday life….not just talk about it here…..
This is a growing process…a time of refinement, and I don’t have any doubts that it is going to hurt a little. I am going to make mistakes. But there is hope that as I come through this process, I will be a better wife and mother, a better employee and friend….
I don’t want fear to hold me in chains any longer. So today it is my humble prayer that God will mold me into the woman He wants me to be…and that through that I will find freedom.
What has you in bondage today? Please share with me so that I can pray for your freedom as well….we don’t journey alone and there is one thing that I know works and it is prayer!