Tag Archives: God’s great love

Under His Wings

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I received a small plaque as a wedding shower gift with a picture of an eagle and a Bible verse on it.  The familiar Isaiah 40:31 “but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” 

I hung it on a small nail right above the light switch in our bedroom in our old house. For 13 years I would see that plaque as I entered and exited the bedroom and that verse would eventually became one of great comfort to me.

I am not a very patient person by nature. Alright if we are being honest, I am not a patient person AT ALL. In fact when I would pray for patience God would give me plenty of opportunities to “practice” and I pretty much failed every time. I have since stopped praying for patience! 😉

So waiting on the Lord wasn’t something that came easily to me.

And because I also struggle with control, I often take life, and the lives of those around me in my own hands. If everyone would just listen to all my wisdom, things would be so much easier wouldn’t it? ahem…clearly God has had some tough work to do with the likes of me!

My husband and I married at a young age. Pregnant with a son at 21, we were ill equipped to be husband and wife, and even more so, parents. I had a “white picket fence” idea of of what marriage and motherhood should look like and when things started to get difficult I didn’t know what to do.

I had what I thought was a “relationship” with God, and a belief that Jesus had died for my sins, but the way that I invested in that relationship was by crying out to God when things were tough, and begging Him to fix the problem (aka my husband – because clearly I was a saint). I didn’t praise Him for the good things, I didn’t spend time in His Word…I just called on His 1-800-CRISIS line when it suited me.

Have you ever been there? So self-righteous and sure that you are in the right, so quick to point fingers and control? Hard headed and stubborn? No – it’s just me?

I am honored to be sharing this full post over at Katie’s blog today. She is doing a series on the Psalms and it was a blessing to study and reflect on Psalm 91.

Psalm Series

Photo Credit: Carl Chapman

How He Loves Us

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I woke this morning with this song in my head – “How He Loves”. The chorus repeating over and over…”Oh how He loves us, oh how He loves us, oh how He loves us, oh how He loves.”

I am a hot mess most days.

We all have our stressors don’t we? Parenting that feels like it is going to throw us over the edge,  stress at work, struggles in marriages and friendships. There isn’t a day that goes by that I think that I did things perfectly and for a Type A perfectionist like myself, this can be a tough pill to swallow!

I want to be an on fire woman for God. I want to raise my children without any serious issues that cause them to need therapy later in life. I want to offer unconditional love towards my husband.

But most days I am short-tempered, irritated with the littlest things, discontent and jealous of those that seem to have it easier than me.

Nice huh?!

But in comes grace. A gift I thank God for daily. A gift freely given to me, something that I don’t always comprehend, but something that is a balm to my weary and broken soul.

God never expected that we would get it right, that is exactly the reason He sent His Son for us.

Yesterday I participated in a fast. The last 6 hours or so were the worst. At this point I was “fruited” out and I would have given just about anything for a dry cracker. I craved grains, it was weird! 🙂  And then there was that time that my oldest son taunted me by eating a caramel filled cookie right in front of me with about 3 hours to go. Ahh yes the love…

I discovered in a real way how much I want what I want, when I want it.

Patience and surrender are apparently not virtues of mine.  But in the end I made it. I went a full 24 hours and didn’t cheat…only by God’s grace really because I wanted to and even thought at one point, who would even know really?!

But you know what I DO know? Even if I had “cheated” or been unable to finish the fast, God loves me anyways. It isn’t about me at all really. I don’t have to do anything to earn God’s favor. He loves me, in spite of me. THAT is the takeaway reminder for me again.

I am going to mess up, I am going to be short tempered and insensitive. I will let my husband, my friends down…it is inevitable. I am not perfect – but God doesn’t need me to be. (<====Click to Tweet)

But God with His unconditional love, reminds me every day that He loves us, oh how He loves us. Thank you God for loving me.

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I am joining the amazing Holley Gerth in her #2014EncouragementChallenge. Where writers come together each Wednesday to offer hope and encouragement to one another. We would love to have you come and join in!

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Photo Credit: LifeHouseDesign

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